Log Time: 9:45-9:56; Vegas...
I performed this morning to an audience of one (me)... and even though I had two red bulls last night, everything went surprisingly well. Some Vegas thoughts...
Vegas thought #1: I am staying at the Wynn in Vegas, and for some reason, the extra roll of toilet paper in the bathroom is wrapped in a brown piece of paper that has “emergency backup” written on it… not just "backup", actually "emergency backup". What does this mean? Has there ever been a situation where you use up the first roll, but decide that you shouldn't actually open the second one because it might not be an emergency? Does there need to be any writing on it at all? On the flip side... I do kind of feel like they're reading my mind...
Vegas thought #2: When is someone going to open a karaoke bar on the strip? I actually think that someone should open a hotel fully dedicated to Japan, called The Tokyo or Tokyo Tokyo or Steve Wynn's Tokyo (or Trump's Tokyo). Japan is just so far away that experiencing a watered-down version of it in Vegas would make more sense for most people. Of course, all of the toilet seats would have to be heated (like in Japan)... you know how your leg sometimes falls asleep if sit on the toilet for too long... it doesn't happen with a heated seat!!!
Vegas thought #3: Everytime I'm in a crowded club with people dancing, I want to break out the Native Ant-Eater Ritual Dance from the movie Can't Buy Me Love...
Vegas thought #4: This more of a story than a thought... the "thanks for classing down the end of my Vegas evening even more" award goes to the leather skinned, heroin addict skinny, 50 year old divorced woman in the inappropriate mini skirt and tank top, who sat down at the blackjack table I was at, at 2:45 am and said to me, the other player at the table, and the dealer, "The red on my champagne glass is from a strawberry, it’s not blood. I just wanted to make sure you guys knew that." ... then followed that gem up with, "you know us ex models..."
Vegas thought #5: Some things that occured to me as being very bad ideas... eating left-over sushi, sleeping with a girl who pees standing up, putting a hotel television clicker in your mouth (I have never really seen anyone do this, but I'm sure it's happened), vacationing in Uganda, refusing to wipe yourself because you claim that "the ass is a self cleaning device" (it's not).
Vegas thought #6: Elvis Presley supposedly died while sitting on a bathroom toilet...
-Viva TDM
Vegas thought #1: I am staying at the Wynn in Vegas, and for some reason, the extra roll of toilet paper in the bathroom is wrapped in a brown piece of paper that has “emergency backup” written on it… not just "backup", actually "emergency backup". What does this mean? Has there ever been a situation where you use up the first roll, but decide that you shouldn't actually open the second one because it might not be an emergency? Does there need to be any writing on it at all? On the flip side... I do kind of feel like they're reading my mind...
Vegas thought #2: When is someone going to open a karaoke bar on the strip? I actually think that someone should open a hotel fully dedicated to Japan, called The Tokyo or Tokyo Tokyo or Steve Wynn's Tokyo (or Trump's Tokyo). Japan is just so far away that experiencing a watered-down version of it in Vegas would make more sense for most people. Of course, all of the toilet seats would have to be heated (like in Japan)... you know how your leg sometimes falls asleep if sit on the toilet for too long... it doesn't happen with a heated seat!!!
Vegas thought #3: Everytime I'm in a crowded club with people dancing, I want to break out the Native Ant-Eater Ritual Dance from the movie Can't Buy Me Love...
Vegas thought #4: This more of a story than a thought... the "thanks for classing down the end of my Vegas evening even more" award goes to the leather skinned, heroin addict skinny, 50 year old divorced woman in the inappropriate mini skirt and tank top, who sat down at the blackjack table I was at, at 2:45 am and said to me, the other player at the table, and the dealer, "The red on my champagne glass is from a strawberry, it’s not blood. I just wanted to make sure you guys knew that." ... then followed that gem up with, "you know us ex models..."
Vegas thought #5: Some things that occured to me as being very bad ideas... eating left-over sushi, sleeping with a girl who pees standing up, putting a hotel television clicker in your mouth (I have never really seen anyone do this, but I'm sure it's happened), vacationing in Uganda, refusing to wipe yourself because you claim that "the ass is a self cleaning device" (it's not).
Vegas thought #6: Elvis Presley supposedly died while sitting on a bathroom toilet...
-Viva TDM
posted by TheDoodieMan at 2:32 PM
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