Log Time: 7:30-7:37; To be or not to be...

Lactose intolerant... it really isn't much of a question because I am, but every 18 months or so I have a positive lactose experience that leads me to optimistically believe that my body has changed and maybe I'm not anymore... so I go out and buy a bunch of cereal and milk and feast... Unfortunately the outcome is always the same, which is a huge bummer for two reasons: (1) Cereal is fun to eat. (2) The common symptoms for lactose intolerance are not pleasant!(http://digestive.niddk.nih.gov/ddiseases/pubs/lactoseintolerance/) On the bright side, I did have some extra time to think...

Thought #1: I'm not prepared to win an Oscar because if I died tomorrow, I don't have a good video of me to show in the "In Memoriam" part of the program.

Thoughts #2: If I had to be "bff" (best friends forever) with a cereal mascot, I guess it would be Cap'n Crunch because he's a pirate, and I feel like there's a strong chance that he's fun when he's "off-package"... because, at the end of the day... he is a pirate. Tony the Tiger was also a thought, but I couldn't get that Siegfried & Roy incident out of my mind. (Chris Rock--"That tiger wasn't going crazy. That tiger was going tiger.")

Thought #3: If I'm "bff" with Cap'n Crunch, and he dies, is there any chance that I get be the pirate, take over his ship?

Thought #4: Best job of making fun of a cereal mascot goes to Seinfeld when talking about Count Chocula --"What is the deal with Count Chocula? Are we, like, supposed to be AFRAID of this guy??"


-THE DOODIE MAN